Believe Rachel Lindsay when she says she was wrecked having to send Dean home. The season 13 Bachelorette revealed the day after hometown dates aired on ABC that she was emotionally distraught with her decision to send Unglert packing following his dramatic confrontation with his father during hometown dates.
In fact, she dreaded the rose ceremony. “I cried on the entire flight to Dallas, and I cried all day leading up to it,” the lawyer wrote in her blog post on People.com. “I didn’t want to make a decision, I wanted to run and just go home and never have to break another heart again. But when my tears dried I realized that, while I do feel a love for Dean, I’m just not sure he’s in a place in his life where he’s ready to settle down and start a family in the near future.”
Unglert’s exit was anything but easy—for both the viewers and for the Bachelorette. “It was a tough goodbye — he was defensive, confused and a bit angry. I know that sometimes at first being angry is easier to stomach than allowing yourself to be sad,” Lindsay wrote. “I prayed that night the he wasn’t leaving this relationship believing I judged him based on meeting his family. I only judged him on if he was ready for the same things I am.”
Leading up to hometown dates, Unglert asked viewers to show respect and tolerance. “When I said my father was eccentric, I was not referring to his Sikh faith or the turban he wears on his head,” he wrote on Instagram. “I’m not asking you to spare his feelings (or mine) but instead to be cognizant and accepting of the millions of people that belong to the Sikh community.”
Following his exit, Unglert graciously shared a post about his experiences on The Bachelorette. “From then til now, what an incredible journey,” he noted. “I have nothing but the utmost love and respect for @therachlindsay and I’m excited to watch the rest of her love story unfold #letloveleadtheway.”
ABC confirmed on Tuesday that he will appear on Bachelor in Paradise. “I’m going to look back at this in 10 years and laugh my ass off, I’m sure,” he told Extra. “I think Rachel is great. I was definitely heartbroken at the end of that.”
For Lindsay, age was not the deciding factor. (She’s 32 and he’s 25.) “Dean is young, but he’s been through so much it makes him older; I call him ‘my surprise,'” Lindsay told Ryan Seacrest on Tuesday morning. “I felt like he was still learning so much about himself and he wasn’t ready for the same things I was. He was learning so much about things that had happened in his past, and he was flushing that out with me, and I felt like some of his love was wrapped up in that more than it was in me as a person.”
Ultimately, she handed roses to her three finalists, Eric Bigger, Bryan Abasolo and Peter Kraus. The remaining suitors will join Rachel and the Lindsay family in Dallas in the next episode for some quality family time—but it will again be a rather uncomfortable moment.
“As anxious as I seemed going to visit these guys’ hometowns, next week I’ll be taking them into my family’s home and it is just as nerve-racking,” she concluded in her blog update. “My father may be the judge, but the rest of my family can be just as intimidating. You’ll be surprised who they like, who they question and who I have to stick up for. Three men walk into my home and only two leave with a blessing for marriage. At this stage in my journey, the goodbyes will only get harder. Sending Dean home in Dallas was just about one of the hardest goodbyes I’ve had in my life, but nothing will compare to the soul-wrenching goodbye I have in Spain. This journey is coming to a close, and while I sit here and write to you all a happy engaged woman — it was not an easy road to get here. So see you guys next week, things are about to get REAL!”
The Bachelorette airs Mondays on ABC at 8 p.m. ET.